Violinist has the world on 2 strings: When Nathaniel Ayers met Steve Lopez
Nathaniel was shy in our first encounter a few months ago, if not a little wary. He took a step back when I approached to say I liked the way his violin music turned the clatter around downtown L.A.βs Pershing Square into an urban symphony.
βOh, thank you very much,β he said politely, apologizing for his appearance. He had gone through a couple of recent setbacks, Nathaniel said, but he intended to be whole again soon and playing at a higher level.
Next time I saw him, he had relocated to the mouth of the 2nd Street tunnel near Hill Street.
βWell, first of all, itβs beautiful here,β said Nathaniel, 54, who told me he had been diagnosed many years ago with schizophrenia. βAnd right there is the Los Angeles Times building. New York, Cleveland, Los Angeles. All I have to do is look up at that building and I know where I am.β

Classic stories from the Los Angeles Timesβ 143-year archive
Nathaniel had an orange shopping cart that contained all of his belongings, including a huge plastic water gun, a single black boot and his violin case. We were practically in the shadow of the new Disney Concert Hall, and although Nathaniel said he wasnβt sure where it was, he had written the following on the side of his shopping cart:
βLittle Walt Disney Concert Hall β Beethoven.β
Nathaniel plays classical music, some of it recognizable to me, some of it not. One day, I asked if he could play jazz, and he tucked the violin under his chin, closed his eyes in anticipation of the ecstasy that music brings him and began to play βSummertime.β
He doesnβt always hit every note, but itβs abundantly clear that Nathaniel has been a student of music for many years.
Ayers drags his belongings in a shopping cart he calls βLittle Walt Disney Concert Hallβ on the streets of Los Angelesβ skid row.
(Los Angeles Times)
βThat was Ernest Bloch,β he casually told me after one piece, spelling out Ernest and then Bloch. βOpus 18, No. 1.β
I was more than a little impressed, especially when it occurred to me that Nathanielβs grimy, smudged violin was missing two of the four strings.
βYeah,β he said, frustration rising in his brown eyes. βThis oneβs gone, that oneβs gone and this little guyβs almost out of commission. You see where itβs coming apart right here?β
Playing with two strings wasnβt that hard, he said, because he began his music education in the Cleveland public schools, where the instruments were often a challenge.
βIf you got one with one or two strings,β he said, βyou were happy to have it.β
I noticed an empty bag from Studio City Music in Nathanielβs violin case and gave the store a call to ask if they had a homeless customer.
βBlack man?β asked Hans Benning, a violin maker. βWe do have a guy who plays with a badly beaten-up fiddle. He comes here every so often. Heβs very kind, very gentle and very proper. Heβs a delight.β
I told Benning his name is Nathaniel Anthony Ayers, and he seems to know a thing or two about music.
βYes, he does,β Benning said. βHe talks about the Beethoven sonatas and then slips back into another world.β

The reason he used to hang around Pershing Square, Nathaniel told me, was so he could study the Beethoven statue for inspiration.
βIβve never seen anything in my life that great,β he said. βIβm flabbergasted by that statue because I canβt imagine how heβs there. I donβt know how God is operating.β
When I asked more about his training, Nathaniel told me he had gone to Ohio University and Ohio State University. He also said heβd played many times at the Aspen Music Festival, and heβd gone to Juilliard for two years in the early β70s.
Juilliard? I asked.
βI was there for a couple of years,β he said, as if it were nothing.
While waiting for a callback from Juilliard, I called Motterβs Music House in Lyndhurst, Ohio. Nathaniel told me he had bought many instruments there over the years, including the Glaesel violin he now owns.
βHeβs an outstanding player,β said Ron Guzzo, a manager at Motterβs. He saw a lot of Nathaniel over a span of 20 years, because Nathanielβs instruments were often stolen from him on the streets. He would work at a Wendyβs or shovel snow to save up for another.
βAs I understand it, he was at Juilliard and got sick, so he came back home. Heβd sit out in our parking lot on a nice day playing the cello, and weβd wonder where the heck that was coming from. It was Tony,β Guzzo said, using Nathanielβs nickname.
Cello? Yes, it turns out Nathaniel started on the bass, switched to cello and has never had any training on the violin. He switched to the latter after ending up on the streets, because it fits more neatly into his shopping cart.
Everything he had told me about his life was checking out, so I figured Juilliard must be for real too.
Sure enough.
Nathaniel Anthony Ayers, who sleeps on the streets of the city, takes his meals at the Midnight Mission and plays a two-string violin, attended the acclaimed New York City music school on a scholarship.
Ayers looks at the calendar outside Walt Disney Concert Hall in downtown Los Angeles.
(Los Angeles Times)
Nathaniel told me a bass player named Homer Mensch was one of his mentors at Juilliard. Mensch, 91, is still teaching, and he immediately recalled Nathaniel.
βHe had the talent, that was for sure,β said Mensch, who remembered that Nathaniel had suddenly disappeared, never to return. I told him Nathanielβs illness had begun while he was at Juilliard and he was now a homeless violinist in downtown L.A.
βGive him my very best,β said Mensch. βI would certainly like to hear from him.β
Nathaniel has memorized the phone numbers of the people who inspired him. To recall the numbers, he writes them in mid-air with his index finger. One day he gave me the home phone number of Harry Barnoff, a bass player and former teacher who recently retired after 46 years with the Cleveland Orchestra.
Barnoff was in tears at the memory of Nathaniel.
βPlease,β Barnoff pleaded, βyou have got to go tell him how much I think of him and that I still remember what a wonderful musician he was.β
Barnoff says Nathaniel was a bit of a slacker when he was in junior high and taking lessons at the Cleveland Music School Settlement. But with encouragement, Nathaniel set the highest possible goals for himself.
βDuring the riots, he was in the music building, practicing. He really worked at it and got to where he knew I had gone to Juilliard, and he wanted to go, too. … Next thing I knew, he got a scholarship.β
Nathaniel had the potential to play with any of the major orchestras in the United States, Barnoff said. He tried to help Nathaniel through his most difficult times, offering him work around his house and taking Nathanielβs calls from mental hospitals and the streets.

Nathaniel was often in a state of distress, Barnoff says of his former student, until they began talking about music. And then everything was right with the world.
βHe once sent me a card saying he would give his left hand for me,β Barnoff said.
I got hold of Nathanielβs sister, Jennifer Ayers-Moore, at her home in Fayetteville, Ga. She was relieved to hear that her older brother is OK but disturbed to know heβs on the streets β again.
He was never the same after he got back from New York, Ayers-Moore said, and he has been in and out of hospitals and group homes for three decades. Time after time, he has tested the patience of the people who love him.
βIt got to the point where he didnβt want to talk to anybody and didnβt want to be in reality. I couldnβt watch the movie βA Beautiful Mind,β because every stitch of it reminded me of Nathaniel.β
As do so many schizophrenics, Ayers-Moore says, her brother would improve with medication but then refuse to take it and slip back into his tortured world.
βIt was very difficult for my mother, because he would curse her out, call her names, threaten her. When we went to visit her in the nursing home on her birthday, she looked at me and said, βI miss Tony.β He was her pride and joy, and she did everything she possibly could to help him.β
Nathaniel talks often of his mother, expressing his love in his own way.
βShe was a beautician,β he said. βThatβs beauty. And music is beauty, so I guess thatβs why I started playing.β
Nathaniel came west after his motherβs death five years ago. He hooked up with his estranged father and other relatives but soon found the streets.
βItβs an absolute dream here, and I notice that everyone is smiling,β Nathaniel said at 2nd and Hill, where he sometimes steps into the tunnel to hear the echo of his violin. βThe sun is out all day, and the nights are cool and serene.β
βAll I want is to play musicβ
β Nathaniel Anthony Ayers
Nathaniel often takes a rock and scrawls names on the sidewalk.
βOh, those,β he said. βA lot of those are the names of my classmates at Juilliard.β
One day I asked about his hopes and dreams.
βOh, thatβs easy,β he said. βI need to get these other two strings, but I donβt have the money right now.β
He had no use for a house, he said, or a car or anything else.
βAll I want is to play music, and the crisis Iβm having is right here,β Nathaniel said, pointing to the missing strings and calling out the names of Itzhak Perlman and Jascha Heifetz, as if the renowned violinists might hear his plea and send along the strings.
Nathaniel refused to accept money from me or freebies from Studio City Music. I suggested he go back to Pershing Square, where passersby often dropped money in his violin case, but it didnβt seem logical to him.
When I brought him a new set of strings from Studio City Music, I had to insist that he not pay me for them. He had trouble attaching the strings because his violin is in such bad shape. But by the next day, he had jury-rigged them and was happy to give me a show at his Little Walt Disney Concert Hall.
I had invited two staffers from Lamp Community, a service agency for homeless, mentally ill men and women. Maybe they could get his trust, I figured, and determine whether they could help him at some point.
But as Nathaniel began to play, I doubted there was anyone or anything that could deliver the same peace that music brings him. He was in his sanctuary, eyes half-mast in tribute to the masters.
As cars roared by and trash flew off a dump truck, Nathaniel was oblivious. He played a Mendelssohn concerto, a Beethoven concerto and the Brahms double concerto for violin and cello, his bow gliding effortlessly as it sliced through the madness.
*
The columnist can be reached at steve.lopez@latimes.com